Somewhere else

Do you ever feel that way? Nothing else can explain how you feel or why you feel that way except that four letter word. Lost. You don't know exactly where you are or where you're going. That's kind of how I feel right now.
I'm in a really big part of my life and good things are happening for me, but I still feel lost. Like I don't quite fit in anywhere in this state, don't belong is more the term. I never felt I have belonged here, not with who I am, how I dress, the way I do things, or any of that. I always say "I'm to big for this place" and I fully believe that 110% plus some. Sometimes that's just how it is.
I don't dream of staying close to my parents or other family members, as much as I might love and care for them that's not my place. I dream of the city. Sirens blaring, people constantly moving, all of the commotion, taking the subway, looking down from a small apartment on to a place that doesn't ever stop moving. That's where I really want to be.
Sometimes, I think it's time I take a drive, take off the rear view mirror, and never look back.
That sounds pretty good right about now. Who's with me?

Style is me

Today I made a quick trip to Layton with two of my roommates and it was fantastic. For once, I didn't work so I actually got to get ready today! I did my hair and make up, put in all 7 of my earrings, threw on a fantastic little day dress paired with purple tights and some fantastic black ankle boot heels. One of my favorite outfits if I do say so myself.
Yes, there is a point to what I was wearing.
After we made all of our shopping stops, we went and grabbed a bit to eat at Zuppa's (if you haven't already been, it's a must) before heading back to our little college town. While the other two were still ordering, I went to get a drink and got a comment on how cute my dress was. Well, this minute-making comment was followed by a day making comment.
The comment?
"You are the only person in this state that I have seen dress so cute."
Wow. I won't lie, my confidence was boosted.
I might live in Utah, but that doesn't change who I am. I am a very style oriented person, yet I do it for cheap. The dress from today? $12 at a small shop in Logan that I LOVE! The commenter is from San Francisco, CA (jealous) and I told her that I don't think I am meant to live in this state and that my hope is to one day end up in New York or some other fantastic city as such. Her reply? "You would do fine in the city, I can tell".
This girl, Ashleigh was her name, seriously made my day today. It might be something small, but I really am glad someone notices how I stand out, which I just LOVE to do as a matter of fact.
 I don't think I was born to fit in but made to stand out, and I'm okay with that.
I conformed to the "Utah syle" for long enough, not wearing my heels the way I want to or dresses whenever I feel like it, and I'm done conforming. I have my style. It's who I am and part of what makes me me. That's what your life should be. YOURS. Don't let anyone else tell you who to be, how to act, what to say, or what to wear. make those decisions yourself.
I am.