Starting over

Congratations, you've made it to the year the world is (supposedly) going to end in. Now what? Well, as with every year, it's followed by a new one. 2012 is our new year. You can do what you please with it. You stay the same, keep hanging around with the same people doing the same things for who knows how long, OR, you could make a change and make a difference. Meet new people, try new things, change your life and the lives of others. I know, I know, this is nothing you haven't heard before, but wouldn't it be cool if this year you actually did something with this advice?
I have never really made an effort to make, or keep for that matter, any new years resolutions in my life, but this year I've made a few. Now some of you are going to read this and laugh or say I won't keep them, others may be inspired. To those that are in the first group, I have this to say to you:
Tell me I can't, and I'll be determined to prove you wrong.
These are my resolutions- I realize they are generic and that's fine, these aren't for anyone but myself.
1. Get fit. Now I'm aware that I'm already a small person both in height and in width, while I am aiming to shed a few pounds (believe it or not I have a few that could be donated to, oh, say Lindsay Lohan or Kate Middleton), I'm also aiming for more than that. While I don't hate the way I look underneath the clothes I wear, I don't particularly love it either. I want to be toned. You know those girls you see at the pool or the beach you wish you had but "don't have the time" to achieve? I'm making the time and, hipefully by summer, I'll be that girl with the body you're envying instead of envying it with you. Say hello to dedication and 6 am workouts baby!
2. No more soda. This isn't as hard as I anticipated. I'm giving it up to aide in the above goal, and, thanks to my sister, I've been doing pretty good. The goal is to drink at least 64 oz a day, I've been drinking well beyond that. My twin got me a 24 oz reusable plastic cup and it is put to incredible use! To put it in perspective, during my 6 hour shift at work today, I drank at least 6 full 24oz, adding the one I had before work and the two after work? I'd say I met my daily amount.
3. Get out more. I'm very busy with school and work, last year I barely had a social life at all! If someone wanted to find me all they had to do was follow my laptop cord to the studio and they'd find me working away. It didn't leave much time with friends. My goal is to find a happy balance with all 3 and do more things outside of watching a movie when I have a minute, life is to short not to enjoy it at least a little, right?
4. Meet new people. This ones self explanatory. Since high school I lost quite a few friends due to one or both parties not staying in touch,and that's fine since I've also gained a few, but one can never have to many.
5. Be positive. Generally I try to do this anyways, but sometimes it's hard, especially for me. I don't have the highest self esteem some days and I tend to tear myself down quite a bit, but how will I get anywhere if I can't see the good in me? 2012 is now my year to shine in someway somehow. Maybe not to anyone else, but definitely to myself.
6. Make a difference. I'm not sure when or how yet or if it will be for someone, but I will make a difference this year. Be it to a person, a community, or someoone/thing else, it's going to happen with a smile in my face for all to see.

Will you start over and do something worthwhile this year, or will you stay the same?
The choice is yours to make, better hurry, the world could be ending soon.

What to say

So recently I was told that I don't blog enough but that the said person loves reading my blog (if you're reading this you know who you are *wink*). I would love to blog more but sometimes nothing extraordinary happens or I just have one of those eh days. BUT, on occasion, I do have something to say, as those of you who have read my other posts well know.
However, who actually reads this thing? I mean really, all it started out as was something to do because I got bored and felt the need to say what was in my head. Weird right? It really was never meant to be anything more but it kind of turned out that way. Isn't if funny how things work like that? You never plan on something happening but then, WHAM! It does.
I heard a quote once and it goes a little something like this:
"When you have a plan, God laughs."
It's completely true. If you make a plan, say a 5 year plan, something will always change in that plan and you know you're just going to have to work whatever that something is into what you already have planned. That's why I don't have a plan. I have a general direction in what way I want to be going with my life, but I know that if I put that direction into a specified plan, it will change whether I want it to or not. That's just the way life is. 

I'm happy with where I'm at now. I attend one of the best college's and I've been accepted into one of the best ID programs in the nation. My friends are great, my relationship with my parents and siblings has grown, and I have people in my life I know I can count on. Did I plan on any of this? No. Because, if I had, I wouldn't be where I'm at. I wouldn't know who I know and I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing.
That's what I have to say.

Work for it.

Sometimes it get's really frustrating for me, life. A lot of people I know have had a really easy life, you know the ones, great families, amazing friends, good grades, almost everything they want the ask for and they get. Sometimes it's not fair, but what they say is true. Life's not fair. I know that one first hand.
I was getting really frustrated these past couple of days because my computer is refusing to download a program I need for two of my classes and I can't do a single thing without it. I was talking to someone about it and it hit me.
I'm really lucky.
I may not have the picture perfect family or the millions of good friends or anything like that of which I won't go into all the details of. But I truly am lucky. Why? Because everything I do have I have worked for. I've worked my butt off to be where I am today and to be who I am today.
I am in one of the nationally ranked Interior Design programs at a university that sets the bar really high up for it's students in this program. Yet I made the cut. I worked my butt off since my junior year of high school when I realized it's what I want to do with my life. However, not everyone sees it the way I do.
People hear "Interior Design" and think "Oh, so you pick paint and fluff pillows."
Those people? They're wrong. It's so much more than that. There's rules you have to know so you can break them, there is so much knowledge that goes into the profession that no one realizes even though it really is in their daily lives. They don't realize how much time is put into projects, the stress some people go through, the sleepless nights to meet the deadlines, sometimes there is even tear shed. But guess what? To me? Every single second is worth it.
I'm happy with what I do every second I'm doing it, and I'm good at it, I'm not being conceited, I'm being honest. I wouldn't be where I am after I've worked so hard to turn around and say I suck. No way. I'm good at what I do and I'm confident in it.
Why?
Because I know I got me here. Not mommy or daddy. Me. Everything that has happened for me to be here I did. I got the grades, I did the projects, I put in the time. I got through everyone telling me I can't and that it won't go anywhere and that it was a mistake for me to choose this path. I got past all of the harsh words thrown at me meant to hurt me and to change my mind. How? By deciding nothing was going to stand in my way.
I know what it's like to work for what you want or you need. I know how great it feels to finally get to that place.
I feel bad for the people that get everything handed to them.
They'll never know this satisfaction and happiness like I do.

what makes me tick?

so i have these little things that some people might call "obsessions" that may be so, but i still love them all the same.

the first i already talked about in a previous post. Alice. that is just such a fantastic movie! that and the deeper meaning behind it is what i really love. Tim Burton did such a great job capturing each and every character and recreating the "return to wonderland" (aka underland), he and Johnny Depp are just so amazing together that words cannot explain it. while i do love ALL of Burton's movies, Alice in Wonderland has got to be my favorite of them all.

next is the ultimate sport of soccer. i have played on teams with my twin sister ever since we were 5 years old and it is the very best thing i have ever done. i tried basketball and softball as a kid but they were never the same thing. i also did the whole swim team in high school sophomore year via my parentals request, but, even though i kind of liked it and  probably would have stuck with it, that ended the first practice junior year when i injured my shoulder. nothing has ever given me the same rush as i get on the pitch though. i have always played right wing defense while my sister played left. coaches would tell us that we were their secret weapon because we would work so well together without saying a word to the other, it just happened. no other position is the same. on defense you get the responsibility of last attack and you have to be on your toes constantly to keep the pressure off the goal. there's such an adrenaline rush that i get knowing that and it makes me want to push and try harder. just don't make me mad on the field or you will most definitely regret it. that's a promise.

third comes music. there is always a song for everything. a broken heart, a wonderful day, and everything in between. you can't go wrong with any of it. well...maybe classical. i really can't stand  that stuff. but really, i don't know what i would do if i didn't have my zune. probably die.

i am also highly fascinated by design. i suppose that is a good thing considering the fact of i am majoring in Interior Design and Marketing at Utah State University. i absolutely love it! i was never planning on going into this field either, which just makes it all the better. it all started my junior year in high school when  i took Interior Design as an elective class because i thought it would be an 'easy A' (great movie by the way). i was wrong. it was not easy. it was challenging and inspiring and i absolutely fell in love with it. i am not a very conceited person, but i will admit to being good at what i do. i think that part of that comes from the fact that i love to do it so much, and if it is then so be it. i would rather do something i love than something i hate for the rest of my life and by George i am going to do it!

fifth, i am obsessed with vintage. i always say i was born in the wrong time era and i believe it sometimes. while i do love very contemporary things, vintage is still my favorite. there's just something in the simplicity of the times then that we don't have now. the style, the people, the cars, the fashion, the cities,  it all fascinates me and i just can't get enough of it! i am determined to, one day, own some type of vintage car (ideal would be a '65 mustang, but i'll take whatever i can get and drive it all the time). it will happen.

along with vintage is my FAVORITE so-called obsession. Marilyn Monroe. 

i. love. her. my apartment has gigantic, framed pictures of her all around it and i am not ashamed of that fact. some say she was a sex icon, and she was indeed, but it is NOT because of her actions. it was because of her image. society took what she looked like and made her into the icon everyone knew. i could go on and on about all of the facts i know from date/death (june 1 1926-august 5 1962) to her real name (Norma Jean) and why she changed it. i have been to her grave two times and you better believe i plan to visit her a lot more in LA. she was a great actress with inspiring words, and definitely not who everyone thought she was. i will forever look up to Ms Monroe for who she made herself despite what societal views were. she was and will always be great. say anything bad about her and you can talk to me, i will defend her. trust me.

we need these little "obsessions" in our lives, these are just my biggest ones. i have many more, these are just the biggest influences in my life. they will never leave me.